The Israelis and Arabs finally realized that if they continued
fighting, they would someday end up destroying the world.
So they sat down and decided to settle the whole
dispute with a dogfight. The negotiators agreed that
each country would take five years to develop the best
fighting dog they could.
The dog that won the fight would earn its country the
right to rule the disputed areas.
The losing side would have to lay down its arms.
The Arabs found the biggest, meanest Dobermans and
Rottweilers in the world. They bred them together and
then crossed their offspring with the meanest Siberian
wolves.
They selected only the biggest, strongest puppy from
each litter, killed all the other pup pies and fed them
the best food . They used steroids and trainers in
their quest for the perfect killing machine.
After the five years were up, they had a dog that
needed iron prison bars on its cage. Only the trainers
could handle this beast. When the day of the big fight
arrived, the Israelis showed up with a strange animal.
It was a nine-foot-long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry
for the Israelis. No one else thought this weird
animal stood a chance against the growling beast in
the Arab camp. The bookies predicted the Arabs would
win in less than a minute. The cages were opened. The
Dachshund waddled toward the center of the ring.
The Arab dog leapt from his cage and charged the giant
wiener-dog. As he got to within an inch of the
Israeli dog, the Dachshund opened its jaws and
swallowed the Arab beast in one bite. There was
nothing left but a small bit of fur from the killer
dog's tail.
The Arabs approached the Israelis, shaking their heads
in disbelief. "We do not understand. Our top
scientists and breeders worked for five years with the
meanest, biggest Dobermans and Rottweilers. They
developed a killing machine."
"Really?" the Israelis replied. "We had our top
plastic surgeons working for five years to make an
alligator look like a Dachshund."