Oldie but still makes me laugh

[RockysMom]

Part 1: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to
> > >lights and darks.
> > >
> > >Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along
> >the
> > >way, cover up any exposed areas.
> > >
> > >Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more
> > >sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
> > >
> > >Get in the shower.
> > >
> > >Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice
> > >stone.
> > >
> > >Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
> > >vitamins.
> > >
> > >Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
> > >
> > >Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.
> > >
> > >Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until
> > >red.
> > >
> > >Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
> > >
> > >Rinse conditioner off hair.
> > >
> > >Shave armpits and legs.
> > >
> > >Turn off shower.
> > >
> > >Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
> > >
> > >Spray mold spots with Tilex.
> > >
> > >Get out of shower.
> > >
> > >Dry with towel the size of a small country.
> > >
> > >Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
> > >
> > >Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you
> >see
> > >husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >Part 2: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
> > >
> > >Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a
> > >pile.
> > >
> > >Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener
> >at
> > >her while making the woo-woo sound.
> > >
> > >Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener
> > >and scratch your ass.
> > >
> > >Get in the shower.
> > >
> > >Wash your face.
> > >
> > >Wash your armpits.
> > >
> > >Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse the snot off.
> > >
> > >Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
> > >
> > >Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
> > >
> > >Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs! stuck on the soap.
> > >
> > >Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
> > >
> > >Pee.
> > >
> > >Rinse off and get out of shower.
> > >
> > >Partially dry off.
> > >
> > >Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the
> > >whole time.
> > >
> > >Admire wiener size in mirror again.
> > >
> > >Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
> > >
> > >Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off
> > >towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
> > >
> > >Throw wet towel on her pillow.
> > >
> > >If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this,
> > >there is something SO very wrong with you. Have a great day!
> > >
> > >Oh, and....woo woo!!!

[TruBluScreamer]

Dear Lord That is too funny!!!!